This story came to me from Iain Archibald of Business Matters. I wish I could attribute it to its original author but he/she is unknown (to me, at least). It is so good I want to share it with you all.
Dear Tech Support
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programmes, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programmes such as Football 5.0 and Cricket 3.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Desperate!
Dear Desperate
First keep in mind: Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the command:
C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0. If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember: overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly.
Whatever you do, DO NOT instal Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstal another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash
Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great programme, but it does have a limited memory and cannot run a new application quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 9.0.
Good Luck.
Tech Support
I love it! And I tell it because:
1. I have three sons-in-law, one of whom is coming to see me today,
2. I have a VERY important birthday with a zero on the end coming up very, very soon, and because,
3. I have a husband!
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